My Thoughts on "Dancing With The Stars"

- I was thrilled Helio and Julianne won, but at the same time v. sad for Mel and Maks. Man, Maks is hot.

- Maks is even hot when he's burping.

- How is it that with the skimpy costumes and running and jumping and skipping, all the women's breasts remained absolutely stationary?

- Samantha Harris's new baby boobs are enormous!

- Sabrina and Mark were hosed.

- What was with Helio and the milk last night?

- I think Marie Osmond is as cool as I thought she was when I was 6.

- Donny is so going to be on next season. He's just dying to get on the dance floor.

- Wayne Newton is a very strange looking man.